I really don’t know what’s inspired me to write this post, but it’s probably the fact that I am a spontaneously loquacious person as such, and believe that beyond anything else, it’s my verbosity that makes a statement, both literally and metaphorically.
Meaningful conversations are an essential part of all our lives. Where would we be without those soul-touching, heart rendering conversations with our parents, or the emotional unburdening talks with our closest friends, or the doubt-clearing sessions with our teachers? Our ability to converse, and converse well, determines the nature of people whom we can establish a connect with and also, in turn, determines our own nature and attitudes towards a plethora of things in life. One conversation can change everything and forgive me, for I am yet again tempted to use the clichéd metaphor: The pen is mightier than the sword. I am trying to assert the importance of words, both spoken and written, over any other weapon in our world.
Conversations are both planned and unplanned, formal and informal, to-the-point and beating-about-the-bush, sensible and ridiculous, but however they are and whenever they may occur, they occupy a critical space in our lives. How well we are able to use our well-rehearsed vocabulary while talking to people in different contexts shape our conversations in day-to-day life. The general temperament and perceptions of people are also contributing factors to the kind of conversations which people have but the most integral determinant here is the person with whom we are conversing.
I’ve often wondered what the best kind of conversations are. Let me share with you a small broadly categorized list of the different kinds of conversations we are likely to encounter:
1. Catharsis – I assume the title has left you in some ambiguity. Catharsis, in the psychological sense, is the process of emotional unburdening. These are conversations we can have with people whom we truly feel a connect with. Our souls and spirits are in sync with the people whom we have this conversation with, and an essential feature of this category is the ability of the person to empathize. People in this category are usually trusted members of the family or our best friends (I’ll say BFFs, just to include the modern terminology). These conversations are often the most important because they help us get rid of nagging emotional burdens that accumulate themselves in our hearts, in the form of anger, jealousy or interpersonal hurt. We’ll observe that the people we speak to in this case have an ability to patiently listen and absorb, and offer sound advice and consolation.
2. Compelled – These are those conversations which are forced, or which have to be carried out in a necessary formal setting. These lack emotional details and are very to-the-point, because there is usually no emotional connect with the person we are interacting with. These occur usually in business settings, and traces are also visible when two or more people who do not get along with each other are forced to converse with each other. In cases here, there is evident negligence and people are talking simply for the heck of it.
3. Crazy – These conversations are conversations without head or tail, spreading to a million different directions and having no skeleton as such – but conversations which make people happy. They often emphasize on irrelevant and seemingly ridiculous details, and there is hardly any personal sense of emotion. These conversations are mostly impromptu but can also be initiated simply because of an urge to talk to somebody in particular. They seem the most meaningless of the lot, but are in fact the most meaningful. These conversations also have a veiled emotional connect which might not be apparent to the people engaging in a conversation like this, but somewhere beneath it all, there is a sense of attachment and longing. These conversations leave you feeling light-headed and refreshed, and do not build any sorts of pressures on you, emotional or otherwise. They allow you to be who you are and are never restrictive. They give you as much joy as a Catharsis Conversation would give you, but they do not have the element of negativity in them. They may even completely make you forget unnecessary emotional details which entirely eliminates the need for Catharsis. These are bond building (sometimes, mind numbing conversations) which are authentically crazy and quirky! One can have conversations like this only with very few people – and the very few people who fall in this category are likely complete opposites with whom you share a very strong love-hate relationship; also, you share an unknown spiritual connect with them which may never make itself obvious, but something which has always been there!
4. Fun – These are just incessant chattering and musings which are a lot of fun. They are different from the Crazy category because there are just conversations which you can have easily with most people, especially if you are an outgoing person. The person-to-whom-you-are-talking-to factor plays less here because you simply want to have a little fun with just anybody! Sometimes, you may initiate such conversations simply because you are bored, unlike the conversations in the Crazy category – which you initiate consciously because you want to have them, not because you have nothing else to do!
Alright, this is a very, very basic post and I have only just managed to scratch the surface a little. This is an intriguing topic for me and I’ve wallowed about it more than once. I hope this makes sense to you. If it doesn’t today, someday, I assure you, it will!